4namerican

4namerican @ 2008-07-20T03:24:00

2008-07-20T08:30:33Z

uhhhh. i feel artisticly constipated. its all ther swimming around banging into stuff making me sick. i just cant find i wasy to purge.so ive been yahooing pictures. not helping though.

does this sound interesting or stupid (probs stupid)

2008-06-28T09:03:27Z

probably wont finish this tell me how it sounds

The Art of Sandwich Making

Some people think it’s easy to make a sandwich. Just slap some meat and mayonnaise on toast and you’re done, as easy as riding a bike, or tying your shoes, but it’s not like that. I cant ride a bike for shit and I still do bunny ears, but I make on hell of a sandwich. I’m like any other prodigy. I showed an excellence at my craft from an early age, and honed it over time. Now I make sandwiches in my uncles diner, a serious insult to my genius. Any way that’s where it all started, at Uncle Steve’s.

4namerican @ 2008-06-28T03:27:00

2008-06-28T08:52:07Z

i'v turned into a watering pot. is wuite sad. crying over someone who left in the middle of the night. like fuckin queen mab. i hope i dont turn into mercutio. i dont really want to die. or go crazy. i promised my self i wouldn't cry tonight and i almost did. because of a fuckin song. it wasnt even really depressing. i realized why i cant get over him.(besides the blogthing saying i love him) i need closure. no idea how to get that short of going to find his ass out in the country.i just keep thinking maybe h'ell come back or call. whoops almost crying again. maybe bastard byzoom and diZ dizee will see this and decide i need choclate and Colin to sing me to sleep (or maybe b will set me up with a cheap mexican prostitute somewhere near the border)ahhhh. i wish i were a different person and could just have a series of meaningless hookups. people who will help me cross things off the list. uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

i want to die and go to heaven where i can smother in choclate mousse and not gain a pound. where wanton sex gods and godess wait to seduce.where everyone id beautiful and equal. where tears dont exist and everyone's happy to see you. the clouds are fluffy, white cottonballs. when it rains no one minds if you dance naked. there are beaches, fields, valleys, forests, even cities. But there is no crime. no murder, rape, abuse. and money doesn't exist.

utopia. freud says im stuck in the phallic.

My personal rant

2008-04-19T01:32:44Z

I hate computers. They're like men. I don't understand them. they're so confusing and frustrating. nnghaaa.I hate baristas to. And just like computers they hate me back. Im like on their shit list or something. I never know what i want to order and i dont know what the fuck grande'. I mean grande. what fuckin language is that is it italian?? Is is baristanese, is it some language from star trek. And you know what people who sit for hours and stare at other people in cofee shops freak me out.i mean you come in and and the baristas make fun of you and then they gawk and you feel like a bearded lady or a midget in some old time cirsus with people cursing at you and breaking of into fits of hysteria. I feel the same way when i go shopping seriously. going into stores makes me want to just buy stuff online. I mean do they mean to make you feel inferior. The same with tatoo parlors, and salons. it's worse than being at a party where you dont know anyone, cause then you can make a complete fool of yourself and no one will remember a week from then. And you know what masseuses make me feel the same way. I mean come on. Your whole job is to help soemone relax, dont nitpick at their word choices before they have to strip(yes strip, red haired maseuse lady, strip).Churches also make me feel uncomfortable.

Miriam aint got nothin on me

2008-04-19T00:40:03Z

new word, adjective: supporta
inspiration: the insanely "cocky"(cough, cough) sex machine Gabe
Definition: undefined as of yet

it will be a word goddamnit and it will be catchy.
Just you wait, it shall.

nihi.

i heart huckabees

2008-03-26T01:54:33Z

i was watching i heart huckabees today. it made me think, though i will admit it wasn't totally rational thnking, or no, it was totally rational just not clean cut rationality. anyway, they kept questioning connection of all things, and the existance of negativity, and i started thiking. Can there really be nothingess. nothing is just a lck of something. a is a word of quantity. for here to be a lack there has to be a... something else than nothing. and in that cse nothing is a something so there san be no true nothing... and now i sound like a loon. and does it evenr eally matter if there is nothin because where ever nothing is we are nto. the nothingness we always feel in not nothingness it is very muc somethiness: pain, hurt, anger, a lack of hope or trust in the good meaning of life. even a lack is a somethiing. some would say that only serious mental patients feel nothingnes, but that cant be true, they feel a lack of somethingness,but they can realy feel that becaue even if they are emotionally devoid, emotionally devoid is still something. And eveything is connected. but does it really mater that everything is connected.it does matter if you think nothing is connected, and it would matter if everything wasnt, but does it realy matter that it is. I dont think so.

4namerican @ 2008-03-15T00:52:00

2008-03-15T06:05:19Z

Iam semi-inspired by zm and lack of sleep and so now will tell you way more about myself than you ever wanted to know.

I am semi-addicted to chocolate, as is rest of female population.
I am most attracted to red-heads, which some people find strange.
Am semi fascinated by rape scenes (examp. Iron Kissed)
Am , sometimes, slightly repulsed (afraid) by human sex organs (or whatever you want to call them)
the bathroom is my favorite room.
the toilet one of my favorite appliances
am a step away from being pescitarien
am intimidated by the mall and stores
I like the taste of pepto bismol
Am allergic to my own saliva
am infuriated by unclosed/ unlocked doors

gonna quit, am sleepy

this blogthing is so accurate

2008-03-15T04:55:34Z

You want your girlfriend or boyfriend to be more relaxed, calm, and composed.

With respect to money, you spend carefully and save your pennies.

You think good luck doesn't exist - reality is built on practicalities.

The hidden side of your personality tends to be satisfied to care for things with a minimal amount of effort.

You have a tendency to overdo things, but basically you value your friendships highly.

When it comes to finding a romantic partner, you base your search on information from your friends.

(doesn't talk about my eccentric nature though)

I'm feeling a little philosophical

2008-03-15T04:53:51Z

Let's think Locke/Hobbes/Rousseau style. In a state of nature what are humans like. really come on launch into a little rant. what laws do you think should be changed. what do you think about the presidential cantidates. What's your utopian soceity? you know there's this medieocre move call ed the Utopian Soceity. a well. answer please. don't blow me off.

4namerican @ 2008-01-04T11:16:00

2008-01-04T17:25:03Z

So few people who see this post. tell me about yourselves and the twisted peopel you've met tell me. irrational fears? weird sexual quirks tell me, enlighten me. Do you think you're crazy? OCD? been Kissing Doorknobs? tell me about it?

I like freaky movies

2007-12-16T00:21:47Z

Some o' My favorite freaky Movies: (even though no one gives a shit)

Happy Campers
3-Iron
Dogma
Breakfast Club
Girl
Thirteen
The Ballad of Jack and Rose
The Craft
Go
Stigmata
Fifth Element
10 Things I Hate About you
Normal Adolescent Behavior
Chumscrubber
The virgin Suicides
America's Sweethearts
Sabrina (original)
Four Dogs Playing Poker
Welcome to the Dollhouse
Bend it Like Beckham
Monsoon Wedding

well back on me last post

2007-11-25T07:23:05Z

i'm quite tired so i won't go on ona whole schpeil(?) but my whole point with it was that what the hell should the government care about what we do with our bodies, as long as everything is consensual. I also think that the same should be applied to drugs and alchohol. 'Cause everyones just doing it anyway and they're never gonna' stop. Though i think that people who tell teenagers about the pros and cons of these things really don't think about what they're doing. Yeah they tell you about some o' the shitty things that can happen to you they also don't say anything bout the cool things, and it sort of makes it seem like they're trying to fob you off. This also applied to death. If i want to do and you want to kill me, why shoiuld you go to jail, and if I'm fourteen and know the full ramifications of my actions and you're twenty-three and know the full ramifications of your actions, and I say fuck me until I can't see straight, and you oblige, why the fuck should the age difference matter.

Children

2007-10-24T18:38:15Z

Those over the age of thirty always say chilren are our future, we leave the future of th world in thier hands, etc. Well if they really believe in the children that much then why do they treat them like shit, like they are property- a mule, a horse, a cow to be slaughtered and used. Yes I know, concerned parents can someimtes seem a bit controling or opressive to those they are concerned about, but there is is line between that and becoming an ageist dominatrix who pushes their children around just because they know they can.

the law and it's shit covered nose

2007-10-23T18:28:09Z

I came here to air my private thoughts (aka perverse ideas) so that's what I gonna do. Now please stay with world (haha not even).

Perverse view one. (not too much)
1.
Uncle sam is an asshole and they like to make laws that have nothing really to do with them. Laws that make me think why hell do they care, unless they're doing it, in which case they're hypocritical assholes.
2.
Incest should not be against the law. It doesn't really concerns us. and why should we care if we're not fucking our brother and or sister.

this same idea applies to

sadism & masochism, homosexuality & bisexuality, and senephilia and pedophilia (I put these two together for a reason more on these later.)